Friday, October 4, 2013

PART ONE: CRPS Clinical Trials [Open as of October 2013]

As much as I act like a hypoglycemic brat when I rant against such therapies as CALMARE/Scrambler and bet everyone to move carefully into all invasive procedures and implanted devices, into some of the edgier drug therapies... I do understand desperation.  Intimately!

Some people also have no health insurance and a clinical trial may be their sole access to care.  Others have intractable levels of CRPS but are still driven to try and help others, and so join in the studies to further scientific inquiry.  In studies with a healthy cohort used for comparison, friends and family of CRPSers can also play a helpful role in advancing knowledge of CRPS / RSD.

It's been a while since I've done a Clinical Trials update, using data from the U. S. National Institutes of Health.  There are other trials but I tend toward the conservative in these things, as wild as my politics can be.  Ahem.

What a shocker to see as a header on the NIH page:
Due to the lapse in government funding, the information on this website may not be up to date, transactions submitted via the website may not be processed, and the agency may not be able to respond to inquiries until appropriations are enacted. 
The next lawmaker (or pseudo-lawmaker) who treats this shutdown as some sort of triviality, think of kids with pediatric cancer who are fighting the clock to stay alive, whose parents are pounding their keyboards searching for options, while these Washington AssHats smugly think this is a political game.

Ahem.

Moving right along.  I used some judicious picking and choosing, as some of the options that resulted from my search didn't relate to a CRPSers' concerns.

Surgical Treatment Of Complex Regional Pain Syndrome Type II (CRPS II)
ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier:  NCT01392599
Sponsor:  Medical University of Vienna
Procedure: SUBCUTANEOUS VENOUS SYMPATHECTOMY (RSVS) -- After incision of the skin a subcutaneous area of approximately 16 cm² (2.5 square inches) will be en block removed between dermis and muscle fascia. All prior detected and marked veins in the operating field will be ligated or coagulated precisely.The tissue defect generated by this operation will be closed by a full thickness or a meshed skin graft which arises during the preparation.
Detailed Description:
For 140 years the treatment of Complex Regional Pain Syndromes Type II (CRPS II) has been an unsolved problem. Recent findings in animal models assume that CRPS Type II is maintained by a coupling of newly sprouted sympathetic and sensible fibres. Therapeutic approaches have included conventional pain medication, physical therapy, sympathetic blocks, transcutaneous or spinal cord stimulation, injections or infusion therapies and sympathectomy. Alone or in combination these therapies often yielded unfavorable results. The majority of physicians dealing with CRPS patients are convinced that a surgical treatment of the affected extremity only exacerbates the symptoms, especially its hallmark excruciating pain.
Patients with a CRPS Type II at the upper or the lower limb will be included in the study after ineffective pain therapy for more than 6 months. The most proximal region of pain associated with CRPS can be localized and 2% Lidocain will be injected into that area. If the sympathetic, deep, burning pain can be blocked repeatedly with these injections, the subcutaneous veins in the previously determined area will be surgically removed. This operation should lead to the permanent resolution of symptoms.
A visual analogue scale (VAS), the Nottingham Health Profile (NHP), thermography and physical examinations will be used to evaluate the outcome of the operation.

Ages Eligible for Study:   18 Years and older
Genders Eligible for Study:   Both
Accepts Healthy Volunteers:   No

Contact: Wolfgang Happak, Prof., MD 00431404006980 lukikriechbaumer@hotmail.com
Contact: Lukas K Kriechbaumer, MD 00431404007177 lukas.kriechbaumer@meduniwien.ac.at

Division of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, 
Department of Surgery, 
Medical University of Vienna
Vienna, Austria, 1090

Related publications recommended by study investigators:


Two Measures of Tactile Acuity in CRPS Type I Patients
ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier:  NCT01888783
Sponsor:  Ruhr University of Bochum
Objective:  This study aims to investigate whether two different measures of tactile acuity lead to comparable results in patients diagnosed with CRPS Type I of the upper extremity. Additionally patients with a neuropathy of the median nerve and healthy controls are included.
Primary Outcome Measures:
tactile acuity as measured by 2-point-discrimination [ Time Frame: unique measurement of maximal one hour duration ] 
Thresholds on the tip of the index finger of boths hands are assessed using the method of constant stimuli. One single needle and seven pairs of needles with different spacings are tested in randomized order. After each presentation, the subject has to report the sensation of one or two needles by answering immediately "one" or "two." Each distance is presented eight times resulting in 64 single decisions. The summed responses are plotted against distance as a psychometric function for absolute threshold and get fitted by a binary logistic regression. Thresholds are taken from the fit at the distance at which 50% correct answers are given

tactile acuity as measured by the Grating Orientation Task (GOT) [ Time Frame: unique measurement of maximal half an hour duration ] 
Stimuli are taken from a set of dome-shaped plastic gratings with equal groove and ridge widths. Gratings are applied to the immobilized distal fingerpad of the index finger of boths hand with the ridges oriented either along or across the long axis of the finger in randomized sequences of the two alternatives. Subjects have to report the orientation of the gratings as "along" or "across". The largest groove widths in the set is 6mm, the minimal width is 0.5mm. Thresholds were taken from the groove width at which the performance was 75% correct. Unless the performance is exactly 75% for a particular grating, interpolation between gratings spanning the 75% correct responses ared used
Other Outcome Measures:
Touch threshold for light touch [ Time Frame: unique measurement, duration approx. 5 minutes ] 
Touch thresholds are taken from a set of von Frey filaments (0.25 mN - 512 mN). Touch sensitivity is investigated by using a staircase procedure during which subjects are required to close their eyes and report when they perceive an indentation of the skin on the fingerpad of the index finger. The applied forces are decreased in a stepwise manner until the subject no longer perceives the stimulus (lower boundary) and then increased until the stimulus is perceived again (upper boundary). This procedure is repeated 5 times resulting in 10 values that are averaged to provide the touch threshold.
Ages Eligible for Study:   18 Years to 75 Years
Genders Eligible for Study:   Both
Accepts Healthy Volunteers:   Yes
Inclusion Criteria:
Patients diagnosed with CRPS Type I according to the "Budapest Criteria"
Patients diagnosed with a neuropathy of the median nerve
Healthy Controls,matched in age and gender to both patient cohorts
Exclusion Criteria:
intolerable hyperalgesia
lesions at the fingertips
high grade digit contracture
central neurologic disorders
psychiatric disorders

Contact: Christoph Maier, Prof. Dr. +49 2343023402 Christoph.Maier@rub.de
Head Dep. of Pain Medicine, Ruhr University of Bochum
Contact: Marianne David, Dr. +49 2343023324 Marianne.David@rub.de
Department of Pain Medicine, 
BG Universitätsklinikum Bergmannsheil GmbH
Bochum, Germany, 44789


Effects of Repetitive Electric Sensory Stimulation (RSS) as Intervention in Complex-regional-pain-syndrome Type I (CRPS)
ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier:  NCT01915329
Sponsor:  Ruhr University of Bochum
The purpose of this study is to test a specific nerve stimulation protocol as therapeutic option in patients diagnosed with CRPS (complex regional pain syndrome) of the upper extremity.
Device: RSS (repetitive sensory stimulation)
Device: SHAM-RSS
Primary Outcome Measures:
static tactile 2-point-discrimination threshold [ Time Frame: before and after the 5 day stimulation phase with a minimum time of 1h between measurements and start/end of the stimulation (day1 pre and day 5 post) ]
Thresholds on the tip of the index finger of both hands are assessed using the method of constant stimuli. One single needle and seven pairs of needles with different spacings are tested in randomized order. After each presentation, the subject has to report the sensation of one or two needles by answering immediately "one" or "two." Each distance is presented eight times resulting in 64 single decisions. The summed responses are plotted against distance as a psychometric function for absolute threshold and get fitted by a binary logistic regression. Threshold are taken from the fit at the distance at which 50% correct answers are given.
Secondary Outcome Measures:
pain intensity [ Time Frame: before and after the 5 day stimulation phase with a minimum time of 1h between measurements and start/end of the stimulation (day1 pre and day 5 post) ] 
Pain intensity is rated by the patient on a 11-point numerical rating scale (NRS). Pain intensity is rated before the start of the 5 day stimulation phase (baseline,pre) and at the end (post, in combination with the other outcome measures). Additionally pain intensity is rated directly before the start of each daily stimulation session and immediately after each session of 45 minute duration.
Other Outcome Measures:
somatosensory evoked potentials [ Time Frame: before and after the 5 day stimulation phase with a minimum time of 1h between measurements and start/end of the stimulation (day1 pre and day 5 post) ] 
Somatosensory evoked potentials after electrical paired pulse median nerve stimulation are recorded. The median nerve is stimulated by innocuous paired electrical pulses conveyed to the nerve by a block electrode placed on the wrist. For correct positioning the subject has to report a prickling sensation in thumb, index and middle finger. Stimulation intensity is choosen to induce a small muscular twich at the thenar muscles. SEP recordings are done with a 3-electrode array. Two electrodes are fixed on the scalp over the left and right somatosensory cortex. The third (reference) electrode is fixed over the midfront. SEP signals get amplified and filtered and digitized in a PC.
Ages Eligible for Study:   18 Years to 75 Years
Genders Eligible for Study:   Both
Accepts Healthy Volunteers:   No
Inclusion Criteria:
Patients diagnosed with CRPS Type I
Exclusion Criteria:
intolerable hyperalgesia
lesions at the fingertips
high grade digit contracture
central neurologic disorders
psychiatric disorders
Location: Department of Pain Medicine, BG Universitätsklinikum Bergmannsheil GmbH
Bochum, NRW, Germany, 44789
Contact: Christoph Maier, M.D., PhD     0049234302 ext 6366     christoph.maier@rub.de    
Contact: Marianne David, Dr.     0049-234-303 ext 3324     Marianne.David@rub.de  

RCT :Thoracic Sympathetic Block for the Treatment of Complex Regional Pain Syndrome I of the Upper Limb
ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier:  NCT01612364
Sponsor:  University of Sao Paulo
Purpose:  This is a double-blind randomized controlled trial to evaluate the efficacy of the sympathetic block via thoracic vertebra T3 for the treatment of CRPS I upper limb. Patients with CRPS I refractory to medical treatment will be subjected to four physical therapy sessions and then the randomized for experimental or control block and then more four physiotherapy sessions. Patients will be evaluated after one month of the blockade (primary outcome) and then up to 12 months. Will be evaluated by analgesic scale (Mcgill, brief pain inventory, dn4 questionnaire, NPSI, VAS), functional (ADM) and quality of life (HAD and WHOQOL-brief).
Primary Outcome Measures:
Analgesia after block [ Time Frame: 1 month ] 
Analgesia (Mcgill, brief pain inventary, DN4 questionaire, VAS) and functional (ADM) evaluation.
Secondary Outcome Measures:
analgesia quality of life [ Time Frame: 1 year ]

Experimental: thoracic sympathetic block //  Sympathetic block of upper limb via thoracic vertebra T3:
Procedure: thoracic sympathetic block
Thoracic sympathetic block is sympathetic block of upper limb described by Leriche e Fontaine em 1925. The block is performed under radioscopic view, positioning the needle lateral the body of thoracic vertebra T3, where infuse anesthetic solution. The theoretical advantage over the stellate ganglion is its greater specificity and efficiency. Solution block: 5ml ropivacaine 0,75% + 5ml de triamcinolone 2%
Other Names:
T2-T3 thoracic sympathetic block
T3 sympathetic block
T2-T3 thoracic dorsal sympathetic block
thoracic sympathetic ganglion block
thoracic sympathetic block

Ages Eligible for Study:   18 Years and older
Genders Eligible for Study:   Both
Accepts Healthy Volunteers:   No
Inclusion Criteria:
Complex regional pain syndrome (IASP, 1994) involving an upper limb;
Pain scores in excess of five visual analog scale (VAS);
Poor outcome to treatment (less than 50% reduction in VAS scores) 
Exclusion Criteria:
History of severe brain injury, epilepsy and stroke
Patients who had undergone sympathetic ganglion block for treatment of the affected limb, by any technique
Severe systemic disease
Addictive behavior, severe psychiatric disorders, psychiatric diseases untreated
Refusal to participate or not initial adherence to orientations
Refusal to be randomized in a treatment group or with contraindications to any of them pregnancy.
Contact: Roberto O Rocha, MD 551182668553 contato@drrobertorocha.com.br
Hospital das Clinicas, Faculty of Medicine, University of Sao Paulo
Sao Paulo, Brazil, 05403000
Sponsors and Collaborators: University of Sao Paulo; University of Sao Paulo General Hospital

Treatment of Complex Regional Pain Syndrome With Once Daily Gastric-Retentive Gabapentin (Gralise)
ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier:  NCT01623271
Sponsor:  Massachusetts General Hospital
Purpose: This research is being conducted to see if the drug Gralise can help people with Complex Regional Pain Syndrom Type I (CRPS I) without causing too many side effects. CRPS I is one of the most common conditions of neuropathic pain (pain that results from damage to nerves in the peripheral nervous system). Gralise is approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to treat postherpetic neuralgia (a complication of the disease Shingles, which is caused by the chickenpox virus), but is not approved to treat CRPS I.
Primary Outcome Measures:  Visual Analog Scale (VAS) [ Time Frame: 1 year ]
Secondary Outcome Measures:
Functional status [ Time Frame: 1 year ] 
Using the SF-MPQ questionnaire we can determine the subject's health and well-being, especially relating to their daily activities.
Side Effect Profile [ Time Frame: 1 year ] 
Common side effects include: dizziness, drowsiness, headaches, and swelling in extremities. Other side effects may include suicidal behavior or ideation and depression.
Drop Out Rate [ Time Frame: 1 year ]

Ages Eligible for Study:   18 Years to 80 Years
Genders Eligible for Study:   Both
Accepts Healthy Volunteers:   No
Inclusion Criteria:
Subject will be between 18 to 80 years of age.
Subject has not been on Gralise.
Subject has not been on gabapentin for at least one month.
Subject agrees to make no change in his/her current pain medications during the study period to ensure that comparisons can be made before and after the Gralise treatment.
Subject has a VAS pain score of 5 or above at the beginning of the study.
Subject has had CRPS I for at least three months to avoid clinical uncertainty and minimize the study variation.
Female subjects of childbearing age must have a negative urine pregnancy test at the initial visit.
Exclusion Criteria:
Subject has severe liver or renal disease that will affect the elimination of Gralise. (Renal dysfunction is defined as eGFR < 60. Hepatic dysfunction is defined as LFTs ≥ 3X ULN.)
Subject has pending litigation related to his/her CRPS I condition.
Subject is pregnant or lactating.
Subject is allergic to gabapentin or Gralise.
Subject has a positive urine (illicit) drug test.
Subject has any history of suicidal thoughts or behaviors, as self reported or in documented medical history.
Subjects with known seizure disorders (except febrile seizures) and/or taking antiepileptic drugs.
Contact: Trang T. Vo, B.A. 617-724-6102 tvo3@partners.org
Massachusetts General Hospital
Boston, Massachusetts, United States, 02114
Principal Investigator: Jianren Mao, M.D., Ph.D.     
Related Publications Recommended by Study Investigators:
Mao J. Translational pain research: achievements and challenges. J Pain. 2009 Oct;10(10):1001-11. Epub 2009 Jul 22. Review.
TMS for CRPS - Pilot Study
ClinicalTrials.gov Identifier:  NCT01926119
Sponsor:  Stanford University
Purpose:  The purpose of this pilot study is to test whether Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) may alleviate the symptoms of Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS). The investigators will test various methods of TMS in a small pilot study to investigate what methods may have clinical potential. This is a small pilot study to determine feasibility and signal to potentially inform future trials.
Primary Outcome Measures:
Change in pain [ Time Frame: End of each of the 5 treatment sessions and at 1-week follow-up compared to baseline ] 
Secondary Outcome Measures:
Change in motor function and coordination [ Time Frame: End of 5-day treatment series and at 1-week follow-up relative to baseline ] 
As assessed by functional capacity exam and physical exam
Change in sensory perception [ Time Frame: End of each treatment session and at 1-week follow-up as compared to baseline ]
Change in vasomotor function [ Time Frame: End of each treatment session and at 1-week follow-up as compared to baseline ] 
Change in sudomotor function [ Time Frame: End of each treatment session and at 1-week follow-up as compared to baseline ] 
Trophic changes [ Time Frame: End of each treatment session and at 1-week follow-up as compared to baseline ] 
Change in motor strength and joint range of motion [ Time Frame: End of each of the 5 treatment sessions and at 1-week follow-up relative to baseline ]
Experimental: TMS Intervention - TBS followed by High Frequency
Application of Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) once per day over 5 days in the order of Theta Burst Stimulation followed by High frequency stimulation
Experimental: TMS Intervention - High frequency stimulation followed by TBS
Application of Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) once per day over 5 days in the order of High Frequency stimulation followed by Theta Burst Stimulation

Ages Eligible for Study:   18 Years and older
Genders Eligible for Study:   Both
Accepts Healthy Volunteers:   No
Inclusion Criteria:
Age 18 or older
Diagnosis of CRPS (complex regional pain syndrome)
Average pain level reported on Numerical Rating Scale meets entry criteria
Ability to perform the experimental task and procedures.
Exclusion Criteria:
MRI contraindication (metal implants or devices, claustrophobia)
TMS Contraindication (eg metal implant or devices near the site of stimulation)
History of epilepsy
History of a psychological or psychiatric disorder that would interfere with study procedures, at the discretion of the researcher.
Neurologic illness that would interfere with brain integrity
Current medical condition or medication use that would interfere with study procedures or data integrity, at the discretion of the researcher.
Currently pregnant or planning to become pregnant.
On going legal action or disability claim.
Contact: Sean Mackey, MD, PhD smackey@stanford.edu
Stanford University School of Medicine
Palo Alto, California, United States, 94304
Contact: Rebecca McCue     650-724-2795     snapl@stanford.edu    








© 2013 L. Ryan

Monday, September 30, 2013

Grader Boob: The Small Things That Tip Me Over

Poor Grader Boob, one of my two Brother-Units.  I would say "poor TW," referencing the other Brother-Unit, but he had his turn last week when I actually used one of those things, a phone, I believe they're called, to reach out and touch him.  For other phone phobics, it is worth it, friends, to remember the person on the other end and not the annoying technology in between.

I'm less embarrassed embarrassing myself with Grader Boob, having had so many more years of practice with him, and his unfailing compassion.

What he really thinks of me?  Now, that, I don't particularly want to contemplate.  For I am far from worthy.

Anyway (my favorite segue), I sent the following email to Grader Boob just about an hour ago.  Pretending that I'm posting some random, meaningless correspondence makes copying it here easier.  You may not understand it;  It has nothing to do with my politics, or any other ardent hobby;  It has to do with... my increasingly intimate relationship with the irrational, such that the irrational no longer seems...
 \sqrt{2} .

**********     **********     ***********     **********     **********
o grader boob!

why are the small things the things that tip me over?  hmm?  i was making some kind of point, that even i don't understand, by doing more than i know i can/should do... stemming from a near-fight with fred.  not even an actual fight.  and, to sum it up, it was a situation in which he deserved an "i'm sorry" from me, and i was just sick and tired of apologizing for myself, no matter how deserved the apology.

¿claro?

so i wake up determined to prove how i don't need help with anything.  my only venue for such demonstrations, now, is within the realm of domesticity -- basically, cooking, cleaning.

so i cleaned.  two days ago, i cleaned the house for about 7 hours straight, and paid for it, physically.  and paid for it, psychically, by the near-spat with fred, who did zero, nada, nothing wrong.  it was just the tip to the scale.

it used to be my self-imposed physical therapy schedule, cleaning the whole house every other day, with an alternation worked in for things like laundry and damp-mopping  (+ vacuuming of rugs only) versus vacuuming, alone. i had some sort of rhythm worked out for morning baking and late afternoon dinners.

then it got so i couldn't do it.  at least not on the every other day schedule, and not to the standards that mom would accept. which are my standards (modified because she never had three cats). still, it remains a goal, the work-my-gimp-ass-off-every-other-day CRPS PT plan.  the next days are spent, guilt-free due to the proof of my work ethic, reading and writing, and trying to defeat the pain spike i caused my self to my self.

i took on the back of the house, purposefully, because that is supposed to be fred's domain.  he could give a shit about "clean," whereas i not only give a shit, i have made the elimination of cat hair and cat odor a raison d'être.

so i was mopping cat litter that the lovely felines scatter in the process of doing their doo.  their poo. etcetera. i was mopping the remains of hair balls that he'd only half-assedly cleaned up.  this is the area where we do laundry.  so i track whatever is there into the rest of our (clean) house with the wheels on this goddamned wheelchair.  if i drop a piece of clothing on the floor while transferring from the washer to the dryer, that piece of clothing has become totally nasty.

we have a portable, folding ramp that allows me to descend, in style, from the heights of culinary creations to the attached bowels of litter boxes and washers and dryers, and fred's collection of tools, dyes, and assorted ADHD paraphernalia. i moved that sucker, mopped underneath, moved it back.  in the process, injury number one:  removal of skin over the second toe on the right foot, the same wound i have been trying to heal since... january of 2012.  incurred during the fall in the bathroom and worsened by the crawling on the floor to try and reach the wheelchair.  failure, called 911, ended up in ICU shortly thereafter.  that damned toe is a daily reminder of the hell of being eventually consigned to the "acute care" transitional facility in february.  a personal hell, because i won't tell anyone all of what happened there.  no one listens, no one hears, because no one can.

then i decided to cool it, and just vacuum the rest of the house.  i made it to the end, had just decided to watch some deadwood (your wonderful gift).

i dropped the box of DVDs and it hit to the right of my right shin bone.  the skin and schtuff is so fragile, it made a sort of Vee.  a very deep Vee.

so fred and i made up while sopping up the blood and bandaging.  making up means we had something neutral to talk about, we had care to take, one of the other.  and then, there was the news playing on the telly -- the right wing wackos shutting down the government and imperiling my much needed obamacare -- more good mutual conversation.

the slicing and dicing of my right leg as i sought to clean my house in retribution for a non-event has left me... desolate.  the pain is ridiculous, thanks to CRPS.  the cut is deep; we argued over the need for stitches.  i won the argument with this:  the skin is too fragile to even hold a stitch.

the pain, of course, is not centered where the slice diced, but on the sole of my right foot and deep in my right hip.

none of this did you need to know.

but i have no one to talk to.

and you know enough to shrug, and proffer an "oy" to the sky, with the proper rolling of the eyes.

oh yeah -- i got oral thrush from the amoxicillen they put me on last week for bronchitis.  the fluconazole to treat that is doing wonders.

this isn't even self-pity.  or a rant.  this is what is, and that's what sucks.

putting on my happy face, because fred has made pizza pie.  pizza pie is fred's answer to all of life's problems.

i love you so much.





© 2013 L. Ryan

Sunday, September 29, 2013

daddy, ella, and elvis: "an american trilogy"

This video has been floating around for a long time but I just saw it today (Thank you, Carol!).

uploaded to YouTube by HoundDogBilly on July 7, 2013


Ella's dad, Billy, wrote:

20 months old and she's a big fan of Elvis and her Daddy!
8/5/2013 UPDATE:
Thank you everyone for all the kind words about Ella Mae! We really appreciate all of the likes and shares!!! She really is a lot of fun as you can see.
To answer the big question, Yes Ella does like to sing other songs. Some of her favorites include, of course more Elvis - Suspicious Minds & Lawdy Miss Clawdy; The Beatles - Twist & Shout; Stray Cats - Stray Cat Strut; JD McPherson - Fire Bug; The Beach Boys - Barbra Ann; Bruno Mars - The Lazy Song; Bobby Day - Rockin' Robin and Richard Marx - Right Here Waiting For You (duet with Mom!!!). However she is only 21 months old and easily distracted so it can be quite challenging to get another video like this one. If we can come up with another good one I will definitely post it.
For all of the comments about the straps on the car seat, we adjusted them shortly after posting this video. They now sit below her shoulders. Thanks for the advice!
Thanks again for all of the positive feedback!
-Billy




Friday, September 27, 2013

"Testimonials don't lie," and Other Lying Lies

For those people who keep contacting me in hopes of converting me to being a believer in the "testimonial" method of explaining the miracle of CALMARE / Scrambler Therapy for CRPS, I would like to share with you the type of "testimonial" video that does, but still only to a degree, have an impact on me.

This is Dr. Anthony Kirkpatrick, director of the only CRPS / RSD research center in the world so uniquely dedicated (The Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Treatment Center and Research Institute in Tampa, Florida) and his post 3-day continuous subanesthetic ketamine treatment interview with a patient with longstanding CRPS as well as sciatic nerve injury.

Subanesthetic ketamine treatments did not work for me, but I do not then go out and give negative "testimonial" diatribes about it.  I understand the science behind it, and knew going in that my protocol was not the optimum one (I couldn't reach the desired dose; I was fighting a very active osteomyelitis; I was going through a period of severe spasticity; plus, success in longterm sufferers is harder to achieve).

My insurance covered the treatments, something they won't do for CALMARE.  I did outpatient treatments, roughly 3-4 times a week.  At the end of this several month-long effort, we attempted to approximate Dr. Schwartzman's famed protocol, which he was kind enough to send me.  I even weaned myself off of methadone and percocet -- fast and by myself (not the recommended way, but I wanted to afford myself every chance of success, and Dr. Schwartzman wants all those glial cell endings available for reprogramming!).

My point is that the CALMARE snake oil pitches are vague and full of, frankly, nonsensical statements. Compare this video by Dr. Kirkpatrick with what is offered by Dr. D'Amato.  Then try and tell me, as a recent reader did in a comment, that "Testimonials don't lie."*  Puh-leeze.


3-Day Ketamine Treatment for Complex Regional Pain Syndrome
uploaded to YouTube by dockirkpatrick


VS.




Calmar Pain Relief Therapy - Nancy's Testimonial
uploaded to YouTube by CalmarPainReliefcpr·

*****     ***     *****     ***     *****     ***    *****     ***     *****     ***     ***** 
* Kelly Ann Sipes (Phillips) said...Actually Bianca, there is evidence that supports the Calmare/ST, and the workings of the "non pain" signals that are emmitted from the machine replacing the "painful" nerve signals(which is CRPS). All of this nerve pain and mis information of signals to the brain then trigger the autonomic response and wind up leading to the swelling and color changes, hair/nail growth and microvascular issues that cause the osteopenia. My daughter had the severe color changes and dystonia and when she was hooked up, after he found the correct placement of the leads and the correct "non pain signals", her color returned to normal and her toes are starting to become less dystonic. I have been in the medical profession for over 20 years and have never witnessed anything like it before.
There is no cure to CRPS only treatment and all the other therapies are for the most part invasive, have side effects and for our situation did not work. The blocks, the ketamine, the SCS, the medications....The negative far outweighted the slight amount of relief if any that she would get. You need to get to the root of the problem and that is the nerve pain and how the brain is "mis-interpreting" these terrible signals and causing the myriad of other issues. Dr. D has 2 books of testimonials of before and after treatment and gets permission from his patients to record their progress. He has had some patients that were bad, they looked as if they were going to loose a limb. It is hard to discount that 90% of his patients have improvement. That is a huge number, and scientific research or not clinical trials or not it is a moot point. It works. Testimonials don't lie. Not everyone will respond but 9/10 are not bad odds. I would reconsider and look into it. And before you go and bash someone and call people names and accuse them of something that they are not guilty of you should have your "research" done and done correctly. It would be ashame if someone was to base their treatment choices on your lack of personal experience.
Best of luck. [emphasis mine]
          *****     ***     *****     ***     *****     ***    *****     ***     *****     ***     *****


This is where I am supposed to blithely slough off a remark like... "different strokes for different folks" or even, I dunno, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder." Or "a TENS unit by any other name would smell as fishy."

Instead, I think I'll post this cool graphic I stole from Daily Kos yesterday. I knew I'd want to use it one day but didn't think I'd be prodded to do so this soon!


© 2013 L. Ryan

"Outside of a Small Circle of Friends"

good evening, i am going insane.  would you like to come with?

my eye surgeon opined, last week, that i was having an unusual inflammatory reaction in my post-op right eye.  this was no news to moi, as i experienced schizophrenic weeping:  one happy, bright eye;  one red, upset, hysterical eye leaking in much the same manner as my brain.

she got all scientific and crap, actually visualizing with her many shiny toys the aforementioned inflammatory cells.

[i make them nervous.  all of that ocular equipment is expensive, fragile, and often hanging around the exam rooms in odd and unexpected places and ways.  so in i come in a wheelchair, wielding a cane, doing wheelies, waving my shoulderless arms around like a spastic spastic person, losing my balance and reaching out to grab stuff -- anything, even expensive, fragile ocular equipment -- to avoid falling...  okay, so it's not anywhere near that bad -- but you should see their eyes, the fluttering of their hands.  they actually end up more on the twitchy end of the continuum than i am.  it's a gas.]

so... tuesday, we careened back over there, really giving them the heebie-jeebies because in addition to my usual ineptitudes, i was either having an extended asthma attack or developing a rapid pneumonia.  my pressures were elevated, which any layperson could have explained was the result of the hacking and wheezing with which i had replaced normal respiration.  i had called good old doctor go-to-guy and his supernurse, and arrangements were made for me to head over to get a chest film after getting my eye pressures and breaking the priceless ophthalmologic doodads.

no pneumonia, no asthma, just a rapid onset bronchitis, also right-sided, for which an equally rapid antibiotic was added to my collection of jewel-toned pills and capsules.

however, starting yesterday, the joys of hacking and one-sided weeping were augmented by the left eye kicking in, majorly.

i'm sure the surgeries were successful and that i can see again.

it's just that i can't see.

too busy dealing with bugged-out sclera and fuzzy, burning TEARS.  i asked tuesday whether any of the eye drops could actually get into an eye that is forever weeping, and got a throat-clearing sort of answer. doctors need to stand in front of a mirror and practice saying, in a normal, confident voice, "i don't know." who would think any less of them?  not me!

so i religiously apply the medications, and they all immediately join the downstream flow of salty goodness. they'd have a better chance of making it to mine eyeballs if i put them in mine ears.

in the realm of "too much information," phlegm chromatics have shifted from yellows to greens, and i can't remember, or care, whether that means something good or bad.

in other news, i played plumber's helper today as sven labored under one of the manor's thirty-two kitchen sinks.  it was a case of the doohickey not functioning and the plumber's clay or goo or whatever it's called having dried up.  a small leak.  but small plumbing problems still mean having to take apart major bits of pipes and whatnot.  i held the flashlight and turned water on and off when so instructed.  believe it or not, i actually made several small suggestions that were helpful, too.  sven was good-humored, my hand was steady, i felt like a wheezing, histrionic rock star doing community service.

i did a lot of reading, which clearly was stupid, but -- i ask you -- was it worse than spending the day curled up under a quilt listening to music?  there are many chores waiting but my body wasn't having that today. helping sven quell the drip-drip-drip was my best effort.

anyway -- my favorite segue -- one of the things i read was about how the online version of popular science magazine -- something i actually do read -- had reached an editorial decision to no longer allow online comments to their articles.

oh, i bet you think you know me.

"hmm," thought i, in a perfectly reasonable fashion, as i dabbed at my crimson orbs with a fresh kleenex.  "i wonder what brought that about."

knowing it to be a reasonable publication, knowing it, by deduction alone, to be science-based, i figured they had a good reason.  no, i did not phone, email, text, tweet or holler for the ACLU to come defend trampled free speech.  there was no wailing -- couldn't if i'd have wanted to -- about "big brother" coming home to roost, yet again, among my favorite chickens.  [i dunno, i just wrote it, i don't know what it means.]

the reason is sad, and it is one that all of us will understand:

A politically motivated, decades-long war on expertise has eroded the popular consensus on a wide variety of scientifically validated topics. Everything, from evolution to the origins of climate change, is mistakenly up for grabs again. Scientific certainty is just another thing for two people to "debate" on television. And because comments sections tend to be a grotesque reflection of the media culture surrounding them, the cynical work of undermining bedrock scientific doctrine is now being done beneath our own stories, within a website devoted to championing science.

for me, as an always correct progressive sort, this was a prophetic ringing of the bell.  i've been driven to distraction by otherwise intelligent people who want to so manipulate archaeological, botanical, geological facts, and other forms of substantiated historical record so that jesus had the opportunity to forgive the dinosaurs while lunching with sinful neanderthals -- just before the start of world war two and that whole charade of a story about the holocaust...

these same people can be shown facts about the frightening sang froid of the bush-cheney-wolfowitz-rumsfeld invasion of iraq by means of deliberate, repeated lying and manipulation of a grieving citizenry and a watchful but essentially trusting group of allied nations... and within minutes, these folks are parroting the lies again, but now they're also impugning your patriotism as an added lying lie.

i could start on the political right and the same process of regurgitating lies about obamacare, the economy, the ecology of the planet, or the overt racism of their entire endeavor -- how dare that smartass, dumb kenyan jigaboo socialist claim the right to try and govern the greatest country on god's formerly green earth?

and i think popular science magazine has it right.  this is grotesque aping of a very sick media culture that feeds jacked-up pop rocks to the brains of already slightly-twisted thinkers.  there's this woman whose tweets i read (because i generally care for her well-being) who grows apoplectic but also eerily HAPPY when she explains how obamacare puts the control of patient care under the devious thumb of insurance companies. you see, before now, her doctor rang up the insurance company and told them how he wanted things done, and the insurance company said, "yes, doctor... of course, doctor."  she thinks obamacare is behind insurance companies' drug formularies -- that they never existed before this black man dreamed it all up.

she is, of course, an isolationist and a fan of us/them constructions, but especially of "not me" verbiage.

her grasp of foreign affairs ends at the end of shock jocks' thought organs and smarmy rants,  and she's simply orgasmic over anything amenable to a conspiratorial story line.

facts, proof, science -- forget about it!  being a lying liar with no responsibility to transmit truth is just plain more fun.

she's not the best example, and far from influential -- i just sometimes despair over the death of common sense, science, critical (and original) thinking in ordinary people.  you know, the salt of the earth.

it makes me want to weep, except that i'd do most anything right now to stop crying a river.

i love political back-and-forth and am guilty of over-the-top yapping just to keep the shuttlecock flying until closing time... but i am, in truth, fiscally conservative, naive about political intentions, a slave to history and yet a poor student of it, and, oh, i could confess my own knee-jerk sins for far too long.  but i research the "other" side of issues as much as i can, and question my self and my opinions sans cesse.

there is also a guilt that i think only a prof, a teacher, can feel -- a sense of truly having failed at one's job, even if that job amounted to nothing but foreign language skills and the literature of "different" people.  every prof, every teacher knows that the mastery of critical thinking and stuff like logic, communication, and learning skills (for a forever plastic mind that forever thrives at learning) are the real objects of our labor, be we football coaches, french profs, or charged with special education.

by the way (another fan-freaking-tastic segue) -- did any of you follow the story of the 80-something year old adjunct french professor who dropped dead from the accumulated effects of lifelong systematic abuse and relentless poverty?  hmm?

[see "The Sad Death Of An Adjunct Professor Sparks A Labor Debate."  you'll be mumble-humming the refrain to "The Lonesome Death of Hattie Carroll" before the end of the third paragraph. I've seen estimates ranging from 45 to 75% as the rate at which adjuncts are bearing the undergraduate teaching load at universities these days.  When I taught at UC-Berkeley in the haze of a far distant past, the number was already abominable.  This is why Brother-Unit Grader Boob breaks into frightening bizarro laughter when an angry student throws the ultimate retort his way upon receiving a bad grade:  "yeah, well, i guess you're just in this for the money..."]

if i had any voice at all, i'd be singing some dear old pete seeger piece.

or phil ochs. lately, i've picked up that old fascinator again.  not that i'm calling phil ochs an odd bit of millinery.

why not... let's finish this evenings weeping and coughing up of lung with... "outside of a small circle of friends"?  it has just the odd divergent lightness of tinny piano and tone with the rock-in-the-stomach ring of truth that this whole post has been struggling so to convey.









© 2013 L. Ryan

Sunday, September 22, 2013

"Above all else, stay in life."

These were my feet, or as I call them "the things at the end of my legs," back
in 2011, which partially explains my reticence to update their current loveliness.  This is just to give
those who are unfamiliar with advanced CRPS an idea of what it can look like.  What it
feels like is in the realm of "difficult to describe without obscenities."  I have it in both arms and legs and
in the lower portion of my face.



If you sometimes feel the not-so-subtle pull of bias as you research articles and studies about CRPS, you may appreciate the work of the Cochrane Collaboration:

The Cochrane Collaboration is named after Archie Cochrane (1909-1988), a British epidemiologist, who advocated the use of randomised controlled trials as a means of reliably informing healthcare practice. We are an independent, not-for-profit organisation, funded by a variety of sources including governments, universities, hospital trusts, charities and personal donations.
In essence, they've assembled teams of researchers, possibly more diverse than most such teams, but no less qualified, that are guided by "what works." They review scholarly publications with effectiveness in mind, based on the evidence before them.

It is the kind of plain speaking that comes from thorough analysis, and that many of us need, especially when we are being offered and counseled all sorts of doom and gloom or wild therapies.  Sadly, some of these well-intentioned offers and counsels are motivated by an underlying greed.  Or so I hear...

So visit Cochrane Reviews --

Cochrane Reviews are systematic reviews of primary research in human health care and health policy, and are internationally recognised as the highest standard in evidence-based health care. They investigate the effects of interventions for prevention, treatment and rehabilitation. They also assess the accuracy of a diagnostic test for a given condition in a specific patient group and setting. They are published online in The Cochrane Library. 
Each systematic review addresses a clearly formulated question; for example: Can antibiotics help in alleviating the symptoms of a sore throat? All the existing primary research on a topic that meets certain criteria is searched for and collated, and then assessed using stringent guidelines, to establish whether or not there is conclusive evidence about a specific treatment. The reviews are updated regularly, ensuring that treatment decisions can be based on the most up-to-date and reliable evidence.
For everyone who already knows that regional or sympathetic blocks are largely ineffective and are still used mainly as a money-maker, this kind of evidence-based review can ease your mind.  And it is something you can cite when the procedure-oriented pain management clinics schedule your 200th block without any evidence of success the first 199 tries!

On the other hand, it is gloomy news, but not unexpected.  There is no magic bullet, no cure, no one therapy that has had overwhelming success, or even what most people would consider any success at all.  We patients with CRPS tend to look at one person who responds well out of a cohort of thirty as phenomenally good news!  There is much that is, as they say, "in the pipeline," but until those treatments come rolling out the medical assembly line and into the arsenal of our own local physicians, we are stuck with the "throw everything at it" approach.  

This is a frustrating way to deal with a horrific disease that not only debilitates the body, but the mind and one's social body, as well.  It empties our pockets and it empties our date books of most everything except medical appointments.  Even my dear Fred says, from time to time, that he cannot stand seeing and hearing about so much pain day in, day out.  (That's where we get our strangely grim smiling faces and gravely laughter from! The effort of suppressing the expression of what we have to feel is also debilitating.)

So take your cues from the "best evidence," rely on "what works" for you, and be vigilant about following research.

I don't mention it often, but think of it daily:  Back in the beginning years of coming to terms with this disorder, about which my doctors only offered confusion and pessimism (two of them cried), I kept running into the name of Drexel University Chair of Neurology, Dr. Schwartzman.  This was years before he offered me an "expedited appointment," which turned out to actually mean "over two years" away.  This was in the days of "What the heck is happening to me?  When will this pain stop?  Where are my legs!? What's wrong with my hands?"  I emailed him in the middle of the night, as the middle of the night is when most CRPSers are up.  In later years, he and his staff would send his research papers, making me break out dictionaries and strain my brain to understand.  Back then, however?  He gave me some summary information, was very kind, but the greatest thing he gave me was this gift of advice --

 "Above all else, stay in life."
-- Dr. Robert Schwartzman
(recently retired, just discovered! a well-deserved rest to him!)


It took me years to peel the layers of that onion... and I am peeling, still.  My appointment will never happen, and would be pointless now, but that bit of wisdom can be salvation in a rough moment.  Use it yourself, if you need it.  I don't think he'd mind...

I return you now to the Cochrane Review!



Which treatments are effective for the treatment of complex regional pain syndrome in adults?

O'Connell NE, Wand BM, McAuley J, Marston L, Moseley GL
Published Online: April 30, 2013


Abstract 

Background: 
There is currently no strong consensus regarding the optimal management of complex regional pain syndrome although a multitude of interventions have been described and are commonly used.

Objectives: 
To summarise the evidence from Cochrane and non-Cochrane systematic reviews of the effectiveness of any therapeutic intervention used to reduce pain, disability or both in adults with complex regional pain syndrome (CRPS).

Main results
We included six Cochrane reviews and 13 non-Cochrane systematic reviews. Cochrane reviews demonstrated better methodological quality than non-Cochrane reviews. Trials were typically small and the quality variable.

There is moderate quality evidence that intravenous regional blockade with guanethidine is not effective in CRPS and that the procedure appears to be associated with the risk of significant adverse events.

There is low quality evidence that bisphosphonates, calcitonin or a daily course of intravenous ketamine may be effective for pain when compared with placebo; graded motor imagery may be effective for pain and function when compared with usual care; and that mirror therapy may be effective for pain in post-stroke CRPS compared with a 'covered mirror' control. This evidence should be interpreted with caution. There is low quality evidence that local anaesthetic sympathetic blockade is not effective. Low quality evidence suggests that physiotherapy or occupational therapy are associated with small positive effects that are unlikely to be clinically important at one year follow up when compared with a social work passive attention control.

For a wide range of other interventions, there is either no evidence or very low quality evidence available from which no conclusions should be drawn.

Authors' conclusions: 
There is a critical lack of high quality evidence for the effectiveness of most therapies for CRPS. Until further larger trials are undertaken, formulating an evidence-based approach to managing CRPS will remain difficult.

This record should be cited as: O'Connell NE, Wand BM, McAuley J, Marston L, Moseley GL. Interventions for treating pain and disability in adults with complex regional pain syndrome. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews 2013, Issue 4. Art. No.: CD009416. DOI: 10.1002/14651858.CD009416.pub2

Assessed as up to date: March 1, 2013
- Click here to SEE MORE

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Idiot Wind: Kicking Back on a Saturday Night at Marlinspike Hall

It's one of those soft, breezy in-between seasons kind of nights, when the heart is wide open, the pupils large, taking in everything, understanding flowing like God's own soft sainted waters.  Makes you want to listen to that same sort of evocative, loving, welcoming feeling in a tune. So, of course, La Bonne et Belle Bianca Castafiore being in charge of our turntable and the vinyl platters this evening, she went with the obvious, and chose the dulcet tones and subtleties of Dylan's greatest lullaby:  Idiot Wind.  She's dedicating it to anyone who needs a clue. Admittedly, she was aided in her musical choice by The Feline Triumvirate, who think that people who harm defenseless animals are not only idiots, but cowards, and probably, sociopaths.  They are feisty, our kitty crowd, and they never cease to speak truth to those-deluded-into-thinking-they-have-power.

If this introduction seems obscure to you, and even more odd than what you usually find here?  That's because I am really badmouthing a relative but using guile and subterfuge to get it done, see?  Now can we get back to pretending that this is just an average blog post and not more disappointment at the dysfunction of my genetic heritage?

No matter what, "Idiot Wind" is one of the Zimmer's best songs, a cutting edge turn of the blade that Sara never saw coming, I'm sure!  Blood on the Tracks, the album in which it first featured, was probably a total eye-opener for the lass. And if anyone knows where I can get a copy of the May 23, 1976 performance, at Hughes Stadium in Fort Collins, Colorado, I hear that's especially well-delivered.  Not with snark... snark is easy, common... no, we're talking smooth and well-delivered, yes, but with lip-curling, lip-smacking snarl. Snarl is... real.

Just a rhetorical... something that the cats want translated from Cyrillic Felis Cactus  into Modern English:
Is anyone really shocked that someone who would rob the woman who gave him life -- rob her of dignity as well as of tangible means of support -- would then, like a cornered man-boobed boor, take the life of someone's pet by poison?  (Don't worry, I'll leave my reprobate relatives behind, just let the bile flow, for the bile must flow, and better here than than up and down the highways of my esophagus.)

Where the cats come up with these strange rhetoricals, we don't know.  But Marmy is sporting her wrap-around shades, Dobby is sharpening his nails, and Buddy is getting a rubdown, keeping it all very loose.  I've switched over to my Bond issue Power Chair, equipped with mini-hydrogen bombs chemically designed to target low-testosterone wimpy sorts.  Fred is in total chill mode.  He keeps pointing at The Castafiore's stiletto heels, recognized as weaponry by any thinking soul, and reminding me that we are also protected by the power of our next door neighbors, the Cistercians, an enlivened group these days, really loving Pope Francis, their new El Papa Francisco .  The tone, explained Abbot Truffatore to a community gathered for the monthly Communion Wine Tasting last evening, is new: "It's like we have permission to swing away, to go for justice, so long as we remember to yodel out, 'Hey, who are we to judge, eh?' after we sink in the rear naked choke. It's a new Liberation Theology."

We understand Abbot Truffatore about as much as we do the Feline Triumvirate, or Bianca on a bender, but since we love and trust them all, we're gathering our Bear Repellent and sanctifying our loins with readings from the Good Books.  I'm reading The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman, Fred is enjoying the Canterbury Tales, Bianca and Sven are reading different versions of Faust, and a couple of the Perpetual Postulants and the more enervated Saturday night escapees from the Novitiate seem to have Marvel Comics tucked inside their breviaries.

I'm in the "Man's Way" section of Book II, and it's Madame Gautier who is speaking to Jane Pittman. My eyes just landed on her version of "Idiot Wind":
That's man's way. To prove something. Day in, day out he must prove he is a man. Poor Fool.
Being snarky (not snarly), I rapid-fired Fred to give me a version of "Idiot Wind" from Chaucer. He's feeling much better, by the way, and responded first with a very sexy eyebrow raise.  Then, without letting more than a second pass, he channeled the perfect 14th century zap of a verbal prat fall:
Then the Miller fell off his horse.
Ever equitable, I turned to Sven and my Dear Castafiore, noting that they were a bit more intertwined than separate authors might lead one to expect, and gave a polite cough.  "*Ack*-*Ack*," added Marmy Fluffy Butt, peering at this odd couple over her stern shades. "What," laughed Sven, "you want us to choose a passage from FAUST to encapsulate 'Idiot Wind'!  No offense, dear Prof, but don't you think that's rather... stupid?"

He had a point. He also had Goethe.  I gave Bianca the Hairy Eyeball, and she promptly stood, hoisted her bust with firmly crossed arms, and belted out you-know-what -- Gounod's precious Jewel Song.  At which point Marmy turned it over to Dylan and we all enjoyed a cold beverage.  And so it was that a soprano's "Ah ! je ris de me voir si belle en ce miroir..." seamlessly married with Dylan's adenoidal "Someone's got it in for me..."

I couldn't help but laugh.  Always, at moments of such intersection, I hear our gruff benefactor, Captain Haddock, crying out from the wild sea:  "She's in fine voice tonight."

The little monks, still treating their stinging baby tonsures with gentle baths of Witch Hazel, were spared quoting from their comic books, as they were saved by the bells marking the beginning of the Great Silence*.  Brother Fratulence grinned at me and waved a copy of The Hulk.

Don't let this domestic scene of Marlinspike Hall at play on a Saturday night reassure you that all anger at senseless murderous rage has been set aside.  Don't be an idiot, babe.







Someone's got it in for me, they're planting stories in the press
Whoever it is I wish they'd cut it out quick but when they will I can only guess
They say I shot a man named Gray and took his wife to Italy
She inherited a million bucks and when she died it came to me
I can't help it if I'm lucky.

People see me all the time and they just can't remember how to act
Their minds are filled with big ideas, images and distorted facts
Even you yesterday you had to ask me where it was at
I couldn't believe after all these years you didn't know even me better than that
Sweet lady.

Idiot wind blowing every time your move your mouth
Blowing down the backroads heading south
Idiot wind blowing every time you move your teeth
You're an idiot babe
It's a wonder that you still know how to breathe

I ran into the fortune-teller who said beware of lightning that might strike
I haven't known peace and quit for so long I can't remember what it's like
There's a lone soldier on the cross smoke pouring out of a boxcar door
You didn't know it you didn't think it could be done in the final end he won the wars
After losing every battle.

I woke up on the roadside daydreaming about the way things sometimes are
Visions of your chestnut mare shoot through my head and are making me see stars
You hurt the ones that I love best and cover up the truth with lies
One day you'll be in the ditch, flies buzzing around your eyes
Blood on your saddle.

Idiot wind blowing through the flowers on your tomb
Blowing through the curtains in your room
Idiot wind blowing every time you move your teeth
You're an idiot babe
It's a wonder that you still know how to breathe.

It was gravity which pulled us down and destiny which broke us apart
You tamed the lion in my cage but it just wasn't enough to change my heart
Now everything's a little upside down, as a matter of fact the wheels have stopped
What's good is bad what's bad is good you'll find out when you reach the top
You're on the bottom.I noticed at the ceremony, your corrupt ways had finally made you blind
I can't remember your face anymore, your mouth has changed your eyes don't look
Into mine
The priest wore black on the seventh day and sat stone faced while the
Building burned
I waited for you on the running boards, near the cypress trees while the
Springtime turned
Slowly into autumn.

Idiot wind blowing like a circle around my skull
From the Grand Coulee Dam to the Capitol
Idiot wind blowing every time you move you teeth
You're an idiot babe.
It's a wonder that you still know how to breathe.

I can't feel you anymore, I can't even touch the books you've read
Every time I crawl past your door, I been wishing I was somebody else instead
Down the highway down the tracks down the road to ecstasy
I followed you beneath the stars hounded by your memory
And all you raging glory.

I been double-crossed now for the very last time and now I'm finally free
I kissed goodbye the howling beast on the borderline which separated you from me
You'll never know the hurt I suffered not the pain I raise above
And I'll never know the same about you your holiness or your kind of love
And it makes me feel so sorry.

Idiot wind blowing through the buttons of our coats
Blowing through the letters that we wrote
Idiot wind blowing through the dust upon our shelves
We're idiots babe
It's a wonder we can even feed ourselves.


***  *******  ***          ***  *******  ***          ***  *******  ***

* When I used to step aside from life and go vacation in a nearby monastery (long before we moved to Tête de Hergé) twice a year, I had enough hubris to replicate the monks' hours, and kept the silences, etc. Wikipedia has an excellent tripartite explanation of the benefits of such silence -- which is far, far different from, say, the notion of "keeping quiet." Listed under the entry "Vow of Silence," are these saving graces:

  • As an aid to the practice of good, for silence is kept with Man, in order to better to speak with God, because an unguarded tongue dissipates the soul, rendering the mind almost, if not quite, incapable of prayer. The mere abstaining from speech, without this purpose, would be the "idle silence" which St. Ambrose so strongly condemns.
  • As a preventative of evil. Seneca, quoted by Thomas à Kempis, complains that "As often as I have been amongst men, I have returned less a man" (Imitation, Book I, c. 20).
  • The practice of silence involves much self-denial and restraint, and is therefore a wholesome penance, and as such is needed by all

I bring this up, of course, because this is the type of post, the type of speech, that is so raucous that one needs to accept that old and dear invitation:  "Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while."  [Read:  "and shut up that noisy mouth and mind..."]