More Specialty Wars!

Okay, so Happy Hospitalist took on ER physicians in a recent Xtranormal text-to-video creation a few days ago and ERP answered pretty quickly on behalf of ER docs worldwide.  See their directorial débuts here.

I did not know, though, that the Medical Specialty "Movie" Wars have been going on for a good while.  (Eventually, these vids will achieve the same sub-genre cult status as zit-popping masterpieces.  Okay, so that was a shameless, gratuitous plug for Emilbus20...)  Now that I am no longer an unappreciated, oft-maligned scout for PTZ (I specialized in misspelled foreign word searches), I am enjoying my YouTube excursions much more!  And HS now has a snowball's chance to catch a new vid as the first viewer ever, the stuff of her dreams... {{waving at my PTZ friends!}}

En tout cas -- I've put together a sampling of these medical tantrums, in order of publication.  In the course of rediscovering the world of medical bloggers, one thought keeps recurring -- how much easier it is to understand and empathize the many challenges these folk face when they choose to couch their frustrations in humor instead of snarky venom.

GI vs Anesthesia

Uploaded to YouTube by addormitus on July 20, 2010: "Case Discussion"


Anesthesia vs Neurosurgery

Uploaded to YouTube by hautegirll on July 21, 2010:
"An animated discussion in the OR. Inspired Orthopaedics vs Anaesthesia."


OB/GYN & Anesthesia

Uploaded to YouTube by ETHERBUNNY2010 on July 25, 2010: "She would like an epidural..."


ER officer Vs Surgeon

Uploaded to YouTube by tubelessbra on July 26, 2010:
"An almost everyday slightly over exaggerated referral"

Orthopedia vs Anesthesia (There are several of these specialists battling one another; I chose this one because of the Anthropology Consult!)

Uploaded to YouTube by tedparksmd on July 27, 2010: "As an orthopod, I had to respond to this!"

Orthopaedics Consult (There are some HILARIOUS ones by orthos dealing with ER docs... One has the call for a consult justified by the fact that "the patient has bones.")

Uploaded to YouTube by randomta22 on July 29, 2010: "Orthopaedic hillarity"


ER vs. Surgery

Uploaded to YouTube by phatman23 on July 31, 2010:
"Life as a surgical resident."


COLORECTAL SURGEON VS HOSPITALIST

Uploaded to YouTuby by troymartin13 on August 02, 2010.


HOSPITALIST VERSUS CARDIOLOGIST (Happy strikes again!)

Uploaded to YouTube by dequervains on August 18, 2010: "Hospitalist battles the cardiologist as the Xtranormal medical specialty battle continues."



In addition to Specialty vs Specialty, there are a good number of "Typical ER Patient" creations that you should check out, most dealing with drug-seekers. Clearly, these good health care professionals need access to some serious means of decompression... I hope these vids are therapeutic for them.

Repost: Lessons in Existentialism, Wedgies, and Trolls

originally posted 9/14/2009

It may well be that Retired Educator is going to go to ground and allow La Bonne et Belle Bianca Castafiore free reign of this blog. It could happen.

Be afraid, be very afraid.

Aw, shucks, who am I kidding? I monitor everything That Chica does, and love y'all just a little too much to allow her indiscriminate and total control of what gets written here.

It's not just Sisyphe that you must imagine happy. When the "boulder" is an audio clip of L'air des bijoux, more specifically a single line from the aria, sung over and over -- à haute voix, à voix haute, et très, très fort -- you'll more than likely want to give Camus a wedgie.

Yes, there is a French word for "wedgie." I just spent a few moments in wild laughter at the discussion over at the WordReference Forums. I do appreciate polite people, even in an incongruous moment:

Bonjour,

Qu'est-ce qu'on dit quand les culottes deviennent coincés entre les fesses?

Merci

I even flashed on Allen Ludden, the long-ago host of the gameshow Password. I can hear the announcer make his loud whisper: "The password is... wedgie."

Anyway, the first responders on the scene at WordReference provide faithful word-by-word translation, not helping matters one whit. Finally, someone arrives with the helpful suggestion of: "j'ai les rideaux coincés dans la fenêtre." I like that one; That would definitely soar over my head were I not in the loop, in the know, hip, and happening. Chouette...

Three months after the initial post, Benoit arrives to clarify things, and announces that the wedgie phenomenon is "faire un Luigi," at least in the north of France and in Belgium.** This, of course, begs the question: Who was the original Luigi, hmm?

Since only the good die young, and bad things often happen to good people, Walkyrie is next to come along. Evil, evil Walkyrie!

Vous le savez peut-être, mais l'anglais a aussi un mot pour désigner une culotte (ou un pantalon) coincée non pas derrière, mais devant, chez une femme. Je laisserai à un natif le soin de vous le divulguer, au cas où vous ne le connaîtriez pas. Ça a rapport avec le pied d'un animal, et là encore, je ne pense pas qu'il y ait d'équivalent en français, à part une traduction directe.

And my taxed brain flashes on the great CamelToe SNL skit!

The last hilarity? Two years after the deep thinking began, a Senior Member of the Forum suggests "un string" as a good translation for "wedgie," and that would surely work -- if it did not mean "thong"!

Even among the faithful, commentary often strays, and this is true of the Wedgie Work being done by these dedicated linguists. In the middle of it all, Quake3 demands to know how to translate the following pith: "My fondest desire? To give you a wedgie with your own lungs."

Hmm. It takes all kinds. That's what makes the world go 'round. And it's a small world, after all. People, people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world. Right-o.

No one really questions the impulse to want to commit a wedgie on someone's lungs. No, they go straight to work. Junior Member Kwaw submits the following:

wedgie = something (usually underwear) pulled up through the cleft of the buttocks

= to pull your guts / innards / lungs out through your arse?

Mon plus grand souhait / désir ?:

Tirez-vous les viscères (par l'intermédiaire de votre anus)?

Se retirer vos poumons sortir (par l'intermédiaire de votre cul)?

De prendre vos viscères par le biais de votre cul?

De faire une lanière de vos poumons?

À faire pour vous une lanière de vos poumons?

de faire un string (entre vos fesses) de vos poumons?

Se retirer votre poumons entre vos fesses?

kwaw

Kwaw later opines, after the suggestion that his French is not up to par: "The one that manages to sound violent while making least sense is probably the most accurate..." I know that's the rule by which I try to live.

"Why, Retired Educator, friend to animals, children, and several adults from around the world, whatever is so wrong with you today? Goodness, gracious, girl! You are frothing at the mouth, caught up in a tirade about... wedgies! Surely something is amiss in Marlinspike Hall, deep, deep in the Tête de Hergé!"

Thanks for asking, Sweet, Darling Reader. {snarl} I would eventually have made my point, limpide comme l'eau, le diamant, le crystal. Since you're rushing me, though, I'll segue to the issue -- bring matters to a head, as it were.

"Certain troubling aspects of a too rich situation..." wrote Simone de B, about "consoling ethics"

-- those entities, often mammoth and institutional, that cannot live with or within the "ethics of ambiguity." The ethics of ambiguity? Believe it or not, but Simone de B has, as central reference for the concept of Bad Faith -- Our Beloved Flaubert's Emma Bovary. [see the remarkable
How I introduced a NYT editorial by comparing President Obama to Gustave Flaubert for more Flaubert antics.]

Emma, Emma, Emma -- how I have always loved Emma! She grates on the nerves, though, and I could use a break from the Emmas that seem to be surrounding me.

Actually, the institutional mammoths of which I'm thinking are more within the order of internet trolls than Emmas. Specifically, internet trolls who skulk in the pus-filled corridors of PopThatZit.com.

Yes, I am enamoured of zit videos. The neat thing? I am so not alone!

En tout cas, mes amis... read here, here, and lastly, here to get a vague sense of my unrest when in the profderien incarnation. Such retardation is -- thank God -- rare. In my better moments, I imagine the harping phenomenon as the work of one small, pin-headed individual that happens to go by four or five different names. Of course, the whole situation is rendered manageable by the capable management of one Emilbus, the site owner and all around good egg.

And it must be said that it's a question of a very vocal minority suffering from a narcissistic sense of entitlement. For the most part, everyone is quite nice, very sharp, and not interested in the dramas -- dramas that can, as you know, turn me into a rubber-necker, gaping at all the accidents on the side of the road.

Studied detachment remains the ideal virtual comportment -- and, normally, I can achieve it. These days, though? Daily fevers are now over 101 -- CRPS has kicked into high gear -- and infection continues to reek havok. [C-RP is 86, WBC over
15,000, sed rate of over 70-something]. When I spike over 100, it's not that I give up free will in order to make little girly whining noises, for I am overwhelmed with physical lassitude -- no, I fall into a strangely frenetic state of just-not-caring, just-not-giving-a-royal-shit.

A hell of a formula! My rude febrile inertia + all the rude PTZ Emmas = absurd, rude goings-on! Thank goodness for the overwhelming majority of stable people (who just happen to share one slightly fetishistic interest in zits).

I know that when a crowd arrays against me, my own conduct must be examined.

I have done this and conclude that I am perfect in every way! Ar ar ar! No, seriously. I know my faults, and they are legion.

However, I'll not be maligned as a pedophile and murderer.

We all have our limits, those tired lines in sand, and mine appear to be pedophilia and murder. I'm strange that way.

Oh, the humanity!

It's a little known fact that Sartre's eye deformity was the result of constant and unrelenting hazing by de Beauvoir, most often in the form of the wedgie. Yes, she kept putting a Luigi on him, until his eyes went haywire. Pity I don't have the supporting evidence -- as soon as I make some up, I'll post it.

L'oeil de Sartre. A rich source to punsters. We giggle to speak of his "trompe-l'oeil," throw the elbow, say, "Get it? Get it?" Much as kids will call out, "Mom! The television just said 'heinous'!"

Fred still snickers during the tedious introduction to the ubiquitous television show Law and Order.

"We can guess at the efforts he must have made to plaster a smile onto that hideous face, to forget and make sure others forgot the image of the marsh, to control that one eye that said shit to the other, the excess of the flesh, the erratic proliferation of the features." Bernard Henri Lévy -- what a card.

The words of a true friend.

Those of you in the know may take my mention of letting La Bonne et Belle Bianca Castafiore have Head Author status at elle est belle la seine la seine elle est belle as a threat. Of course, those of you in the know are not the stupid, provincial, assinine, dirty-minded, acephalic -- and just plain *rude* -- denizens of whom I speak.

Marx and Engels might rethink their whole concept if they knew some of The Workers I've met in the last 72 hours or so.

But then, I might be guilty of perpetrating noise pollution on your lent ears -- a crime that carries quite the penalty:

It is an offence under the EP Act to emit objectionable noise. A maximum penalty of over $250,000 may apply, while for a continuing offence a daily penalty of over $125,000 may be imposed.

You may also be liable under health legislation for noise emissions which are considered dangerous to health or offensive.

Qu'est ce qu'un troll ?
Uploaded by prodnouillesque.

**In Québec: avoir la strap prise dans la poulie

The Zit Poppers' Manifesto by Emilbus of PTZ

Let your Freak Flag fly!

Zit Poppers Unite:

There seems to be a lot of misunderstandings about people who
• Have zits
• Pop zits
• Obsess over zits
• Stare at other peoples zits

First and foremost-EVERYONE has an opinion on zits. Some people think they are gross (these are usually secret zit poppers), those who think they are fun and those who think they are fascinating. Zit poppers do not discriminate; they come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and walks of life. Not all zit poppers are the same, however. The fascination with zits and zit popping can take many different forms.

Enthusiastic zit poppers: These people are not only anxious to pop their own zits but always secretly (and sometimes not so secretly) want to pop any zit they see. These people are the ones who run to the restroom if you tell them they have a zit. They do not go there to try to hide the zit but instead to estimate EPPT (Estimated Prime Popping Time).

Patient zit poppers: These incredibly patient people are content to just let nature take its course and wait until just the right time to let that baby explode. They are in no rush. The building excitement is what motivates these zit poppers.

Obsessive zit poppers: Normally, the obsessive zit poppers will check their face (and frequently the rest of their body) for zits quite frequently throughout the day. Any zit, any size or shape and it must be popped immediately for satisfaction to be obtained.

OPZP: These fascinating people do have some interest in their own zits but the real excitement comes when they observe and (hold onto your hats) even get the chance to pop other peoples zits. OPZP stands for “Other people’s zit poppers”. They fantasize about popping the zits of other people. When they are talking to someone who has a juicy zit, they are not really listening. They are imagining themselves reaching out and setting that compilation of pus loose.

Casual zit poppers: These zit poppers have no particularly strong feelings about zits but they will, on occasion, take pleasure in aiding a zit explosion. Casual zit poppers often develop into another more intense type of zit popper, but not always.

No one is immune from zits and there is no one who has absolutely never taken an interest in at least one zit in their life. Even people who find zits completely gross often find themselves fascinated (albeit sickened) when they do pop a zit. For some unexplained reason, it is human nature. Perhaps it is something like primates who pick lice off of themselves and other primates-it’s just what they do.

Every zit popper also has their favorite type of zit as no two zits are created equal. There are some who prefer the meekness of a little whitehead. Some are trying to pop a zit that has barely surfaced and is still just a red bump. The pus factor varies from person to person. Some like just a little pus and others wait until just the right time when the pressure built up by the pus is just right, then they pop it. Ahhhh, satisfaction at last.

People from all walks of life are zit poppers, some just keep it a secret. These people are often found late at night on the web looking for videos of popping zits. They would never admit to their addiction to these sights but they are there none-the-less. Some are just the opposite and are downright enthusiastic about their zit popping adventures. Of course, they realize they have to be careful with whom they share their love of zits but they never really try to hide it. They invite people over to watch videos of popping zits. They are known in the zit popping circles as “zit fanatics”.

There really is nothing one can do if they just happen to love popping zits, or popping other peoples zits, or watching people pop zits. There are more people who have this love of zits than you may ever know. Some lucky zit poppers make the acquaintance of others that share their hobby. There should be no shame in zit popping, especially if you do it in the privacy of your own home. It is not recommended you obsessively try to pop zits and attract attention to it in public places. This often leads to getting banned from those places! Never let anyone shame you for being a zit popper. Everyone has their quirks and the person who is berating you for being a zit popper is probably a nose picker.

Zit poppers can take comfort that they are not alone. The person standing next to you could quite possibly be a zit fanatic. You just never know, do you? Gardeners are known for taking great pride in a sprouting plant that they have planted and tended. On the other hand, there are zit poppers who will pop no zit before it is time. They know precisely when that zit is ready to explode and they find great satisfaction in that. Gardener-Zit popper; same thing really.

Almost everyone gets zits. Even the most obsessively hygienic person can have zits because they are just a fact of life. Zit poppers are often stereotyped and treated badly when they are just like every other member of society. Everyone has their kinks so don’t let anyone tell you that yours is wrong. Often, the harshest judges of zit poppers have habits much worse than simply releasing a pus-filled skin imperfection. There are eye pickers, nose pickers, ear diggers and all sorts of people with bizarre little habits. Zit poppers unite! Stand proud whether you admit your quirk to the world or not, you should never let anyone generalize about you. So, you’re a zit popper. It could be worse. You could be a serial killer. Hold your head up high and keep on blasting those zits. It is said that 3 out of every 4 people is a zit popper. Of course, it is also said that 75% of statistics are made up on the spot.