Monday, October 10, 2011

belle::position::amour -- the third incarnation



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At our Family Meeting last evening, held in the Haddock Clan's rendition of the Knoppenburg Manor* Stables, we voted to repost belle::position::amour for a third year, despite a barrage of online petitions from Change.org calling for its removal.

Although we've signed a fair number of Change.org petitions, usually with their authors breathing down our collective back, a quick Family Canvas showed that, au fond, we do not believe that "empower[ing] anyone, anywhere to start and win campaigns for social change" is altogether desirable.   Oh, put your tongue back in your mouth.

Mostly, though, the Family reasoned that keeping belle::position::amour might be the only way to remain statistically relevant in the blogosphere, since we continue to receive a good number of daily visits from searchers in politically and socially repressive countries, searching for the best ways to get it on.

Call it part of our Liberal Bias, call it What You Will, belle::position::amour is the star
 of our Outreach Program for Excellence.  Well, okay, it is second only to XXX Porn -- about which, surprisingly, we've received nary a petition.

* Knoppenburg Manor is, in fact, for sale. Sad that one of its key selling points is that this area of Belgium has "remained free
 from the threat of terrorist attacks." Our stable replica -- or "agricultural outbuilding" -- is a lovely place in which to relax, chat, contemplate -- at least on warm days. Built some time in the 16th century, the Manor Knoppenburg's charm is in its 
simplicity and enduring functionality. Make a bid!

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At 3:41 pm this afternoon, a visitor from Qatar dropped by. From far away Doha, Ad Dawhah, this person was steered here by their search engine: google.com.qa.

Like so many who have come before, tongues hanging out, my qatari friend was looking for "belle position amour."

We here at elle est belle la seine la seine elle est belle cannot let such a quizzical, and perhaps painful, cry pass unanswered.

Our first thought was the usual one -- throw the Kama Sutra at it. But really, if someone has resorted to googling sexual positions that are "belles" -- something more immediately accessible might be à propos.



And so the final consensus was to recommend the following:

Sex Deck: Playful Positions to Spice Up Your Love Life
by Dr. Dawn Harper

(Cards)
Buy new: $14.95
SALE @ Amazon: $10.17, Eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25;
You Save: $4.78 (32%)


[We heartily recommend investing in the NEW, for reasons of basic hygiene.]
Want it delivered Tuesday, October 11? Order it in the next 10 hours and 4 minutes, and choose One-Day Shipping at checkout!


To be honest, we are not familiar with Dr. Harper's book but love the idea of sex positions being put on cards -- very handy. Once you get to Amazon.com to check it out, there will be other books of the same ilk advertised on the page. Our feelings won't be in the least hurt should you choose another guidebook.

However, in the interest of quality control, it would be helpful to this website's management
if you would return to the comment section for this blog post to share
what position did, indeed, turn out to be very, very belle.


[cue music... dim lights...]




Sincerely,

La Bonne et Belle Bianca Castafiore

The Retired Educator

Fred

Sam-I-Am

Marmy

The Dobster

Uncle Kitty Big Balls

(the original signatories)




photo credit 1 -- that's **spooning**, people, **spooning**!
photo credit 2

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